Everybody's Got a Load!

Every person we meet is carrying a load. Their wagon may not be as full as your wagon, but it's still a load to them. Look around. Our wagons are full. Some are carrying financial stress, job loss, dysfunctional family members, divorce, an overbearing boss, impossible deadlines, health concerns, the death of a loved one, addiction, depression, education challenges, economic uncertainty, a broken friendship, shame, pride, the challenges of parenting a special needs child, a dark past, housing issues, a car on it's last leg, euthanasia of a beloved pet, and much more. Yes, I understand that many of these loads are self-inflicted from poor decisions, behavior, and lifestyles. That said, it doesn't make all these overloaded wagons around us go away.

When we regularly disregard, or dismiss the pain of others we begin a dangerous and often irreversible slide into self. Suddenly, everyone else's pain, problems and heartaches are measured against our own. We reason that while their pain is big, it's not what we are facing. It amazes me how self-absorbed we can be.

One thing I learned from cancer is that there is always someone carrying a heavier load than me. I met some incredibly brave people in chemo and radiation that were battling far more serious forms of cancer and several of them had very bleak medical futures. Despite it they forged ahead and many of them were often trying to help others carry their baggage while struggling under the weight of their own!

I understand that life gets, well busy. And the pace is flying so fast that we can easily get so caught up in the race that we fail to notice those around us who are simply trying to tread water to keep from drowning. But that's still no excuse for ignoring our neighbor. It's easy to get so overwhelmed by our own junk that we start to close off the world around us and simply focus on nothing but our particular hurt, pain or problem. It's still no excuse to ignore our neighbor. Call me cynical, but a great deal of our culture is selfish and the care of neighbor is becoming a rare commodity. "I want...." "I think...." "I know...." These are some of the phrases that mark those consumed with their own load. "We...." "You can....." "Let me...." "I'm here..." are the phrases of a burden bearer.

One of the most powerful images for me in the gospels is Jesus, on the last week with "skin on" carrying the enormous weight of His agonizing death for something He did not do, weeping over His people. He wept over their baggage (sin) and the loads they were carrying. I wish I could say with certainty that if I was facing death I would be thinking about others, but I can't say that emphatically. I would like to think I would, and I hope I do when the time comes. But I can't imagine facing what Jesus knew was before Him and having the presence of mind to keep an open heart for those around Him. That is the ultimate in compassion, mercy, and grace. Imagine having a heart so full for the very people who were responsible for your impending capital punishment that you would weep over them? Mind-blowing, culture-defying grace!

Neighbor is one of the most basic fundamentals of Scripture. To treat our neighbor as ourself is the ultimate demonstration of God's love. It is the tangible expression of the "royal law of love" James mentions. And remember, Jesus told a parable in Luke about the Good Samaritan that taught us that our neighbor is anyone we meet, not just those in our social circle.

The next time you are in a public place look around. Their are heavy hearts all around us. Be a source of light. Be an encourager. Be a joy-bringer. Be a burden-bearer. I can tell you from personal experience that when you help lighten someone else's load your own wagon gets lighter, or perhaps it stays the same, but your perspective changes. And that is a grace-filled moment!

IMPORTANT POSTSCRIPT! Some people have really high mercy gifts and they have no problem carrying the loads of others. In fact they tend to take on way too much and ignore their own wagon. They can't say no. Their health, family, relationships, job and personal welfare suffer as a result. There is an emotional weight limit to the loads we can carry beside our own. Take care of yourself. You can't give so much to others that you ignore your own physical, mental, emotional health and soul care! Minister's, healthcare providers, care-givers, and social workers are some of the greatest offenders in this regard. Take time for yourself and don't feel guilty about it. Jesus regularly withdrew to recharge and renew His spirit. What makes you think you can do without it, if Jesus didn't? The only way you can carry the burdens of others is if you are in shape for the journey. Otherwise you are going to burn out. Take time for your own wagon, but don't make it an idol of self pity. There is a fine line between helping and enabling. Wise are those who seek a healthy balance and don't cross that line. By the way this is a very small portion of the population, but for those who do, STOP!