Growing Weary and Losing Heart, Not!

According to the writer of Hebrews, every Christ-follower, whether male, female, layperson, clergy, or missionary, etc., should have the same focus: "Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfector of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. Consider him who endured such opposition from sinful men, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart."

When I heard the weekend news about Colorado mega-church pastor and (now former) President of the National Association of Evangelicals, Ted Haggard, my heart sank. I was saddened, sick and angry. My thoughts and prayers were focused on his family and church. I also thought about how lonely and dark life must appear to him right now. I didn't wonder whether the initial accusations of his drug use and homosexual activity were true or not. I knew that the truth would ulitmately come to light. I simply ached for everyone and I mean everyone involved. Now the truth is out and the national media, political pundits, resident cynics and hired arm-chair quarterbacks are weighing in with their opinions. Some of them are downright cruel and equally as sinful (judgment, critical spirit) as the very behavior they are analyzing.

I take no joy or delight in the public or private pain of another human, organization, team or business. The list of influential people in the public spotlight who have crashed recently are too numerous to mention. Nearly all of them fell victim to self-inflicted wounds fueled by bad choices. Seems like I've made some bad decisions in my life too! I used to be right in the middle of the "pile-on" group, offering after-the-fact criticism and public disdain for the individual, or behavior in question. I used to get sucked into the powerful temptation to join fellow pastors or ministers who were quick to accuse, judge, gossip, and critique similar situations. However, since those days I have discovered (or rediscovered) that the first and final default for a Christ-follower should be love. And perhaps its only because I've become keenly aware of my own shortcomings, sins and failures that so desperately need, crave and respond to that kind of love. You can preach sin, judgment, condemnation and disobedience all you want, but at the end of the day we are only made right with God through the unconditional love and sacrifice of Jesus.

Ted Haggard did what every Christ follower has done at least once----he grew weary and lost heart. It's easy to do. It happens whenever we take our eyes off Jesus. Some people get sidetracked by affluence, and possessions. Others lose sight because of the intoxication of power and fame. However, scripture is clear. When we focus on Jesus and His phenomenal act of love (the cross) on our behalf, we will not grow weary and we will not lose heart! Saying that is easy, staying Christ and cross-focused is not. It's the most challenging thing a human can ever do. But because of our own imperfect souls we must focus exclusively on Christ because it is in fact the only thing that brings relief, healing and forgiveness to a wounded soul. And all of us, ALL of us suffer wounds of the soul.

I'm reading a new book by Jerry Bridges of Navigators. It's entitled, "The Fruitful Life," and it's about the fruit of the Spirit. I was reading the chapter on love when all of this went down last Friday. Jerry writes: "Devotion to God is the only motivation acceptable to God for the development and exercise of Christian character. But devotion to God finds its outward expression in loving one another. ....our devotion to God is validated by our love for other people......To recognize that there is somone I do not love is to say to God, 'I do not love you enough to love that person.' "

The first news report I saw about Ted Haggard came across the television as I read those words. It stopped me in my tracks. And then I went on to read: "Do we love one another enough to forgive each other, with or without apologies for wrongs done to us?....In order to forgive our brother, we must be satisfied with God's justice and forego the satisfaction of our own.....And love forgives at great cost to itself; it does not demand justice or even changed behavior from its brother. This forgiven aspect of love enables us to be patient with one another and live at peace with one another. It enables us to deal gently with each other, even when we are sinned against."

Just as we choose who, or what will be the focus of our lives, we also choose how we will respond to those who make poor choices and take their eyes off Christ. Though angry, hurt and heartbroken I am choosing love. May God's grace smother the Haggard family as this human and wounded shepherd begins the painful process of repentance. May God stir the spirit of the accuser, and may He continue to lead, protect, guide and shepherd His church in Colorado and beyond despite the human failings of her earthly leaders!